The Web Doctor

Triage (pronounced tree-ahzh) is a medical procedure which The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language (Fourth Edition. Retrieved September 19, 2006, from Dictionary.com website) defines as:

A process for sorting injured people into groups based on their need for or likely benefit from immediate medical treatment. Triage is used in hospital emergency rooms, on battlefields, and at disaster sites when limited medical resources must be allocated.

I started helping folks with their computers as The Web Doctor a few months ago, and I've found that you are likely to have one of three different types of problems:

1. One that I can solve for you,
2. One for which I can advise you, and
3. One for which there's no help… at least from me.

Here is some further explanation of the three types:

1. If you need some instruction on getting the most from your computer, that's something I can provide for you. If your computer is sick with bad software (viruses, worms, trojans, adware, and the like), I can provide my healing touch. If you need some free or inexpensive software to make your computing life more healthy, I have a good collection in my doctor bag.
2. Perhaps your computer has a problem that needs a different specialist (computer repair expert or the company where you bought it). Although I can't provide a total solution, I'll be able to point you in the right direction.
3. Lastly, your computer may be dead or have symptoms that are a total mystery to me. The doctors call this latter problem "idiopathic," meaning "I don't have a clue." I'm not sure if the word "idiot" applies here or not… naah.

When you call me for help, I try to get some idea of the situation while we're talking. That enables me to get an idea of the "medicines" and "instruments" I need to bring. I've also tried to determine whether or not your case is the #3 type, where I won't be able to provide much help. But I'm afraid I may have been turning patients away for which I actually could have provided some help… and I don't like that.

To be sure that I give you just the help you need that I can supply and that I don't charge you too much for it, I'm going to institute Triage for Computers and use the following fee schedule:

1. $50: When I provide you with significant help,
2. $25: When I can give you good advice, and
3. Mileage only (50¢/mile): When there's no help from me.

Life Insurance

One of the most common causes of the Triage Type 3 situation (hopeless) is lightning. If a bolt strikes your house, it will likely fry every piece of electronic equipment in it. Even if a strike hits down the street, a high voltage surge can travel over the telephone lines and power lines, wreaking havoc with any of your equipment that is connected.

You can protect yourself against this disaster by unplugging all your equipment when an electrical storms comes near… if you're at home. The best "life insurance" against lightning is a good surge suppressor. A good surge suppressor suppresses (puts down) the surge of voltage that a lightning strike sends across the power and telephone lines to your house. Did you notice that I used italics twice for the word good? That's because all surge suppressors are not created equal, and only the better ones provide any protection against lightning.

Companies that make good surge suppressors include Panamax, APC, and Tripp Lite. For example, a Panamax SP8T will cost $40 plus shipping. It provides protection against surges over power and telephone lines, and the company provides a $50,000 insurance policy against any damage to your equipment.

An even more useful kind of "life insurance" for your computer is a UPS. No, not the shipping company, an uninterruptible power supply. A UPS is basically a big rechargeable battery with a charger and some controlling electronics. A less serious change in your house's electricity is when the power goes off. Sometimes it can go off and on repeatedly, and this is not good for any electronic devices that are on at the time. The power also has a bad habit of going off while you're creating a prize-winning novel and have forgotten to save your work recently. Well, a UPS protects you against just such hazards. It keeps your computer going when the electricity goes off, and if the power outage lasts any time, it provides you with the opportunity to save your work and shut your computer down properly.

I would recommend the APC Back-UPS ES 500 watt unit for $60 plus shipping. It provides power and telephone protection, and has a $75,000 equipment warranty. It would give you around 10 minutes to see if the power's coming back on, and if not, to shut your computer down.